Father Abraham had many sons, and many sons had father Abraham. I am one of them, and so are you, so let’s just praise the Lord…

I get a bit dizzy thinking about that song. In truth, it’s never been one of my Sunday School favorites.

That said, of all the metaphors Scripture uses for the church, the imagery of being God’s family resonates the most with me at this stage in my life (Gal. 4:4-7, Rom 8:15-17, 1 John 3:1, Heb. 13:1, 1 Peter 1:22).

The idea of family can be a challenging reality though, and we all bring different dynamics from our own family cultures into the collective gathering of God’s people. Given our individual family models, when it comes to dealing with issues, some may be prone to fight loud and long, while others may wish to ignore and work to avoid conflict all together.

In my family, whether I wanted to or not, we would always circle up and hash out problems. “After all,” my dad would say, if it’s not addressed, it’s not likely to change. This was my goal for the “Dear Church” series. It’s also why I feel the need to include this final post.

Communication, while important, isn’t necessarily easy, and there is always the potential to be misunderstood. While the goal of this series has been to raise awareness for honest consideration and prayerful reflection, anything can be taken to an excess, and what I don’t want is for someone reading these posts to conclude that it is possible to love Jesus, but not his church.

So, as the “Dear Church” series comes to an end, let me present two final points for pondering:

First, Christ loves the church. Ephesians 5:25 specifically recounts the sacrificial love that Christ demonstrated for the church. In Christ we have been adopted into this large, diverse family that he loves and gave his life for. It would be foolish to believe that loving Christ wouldn’t involve loving his church, or that it wouldn’t be costly for us too. 

It is worth noting that this reference of Christ and the church in Ephesians is fitted within the framework of instructions for the Christian family. Former pastor, now writer and speaker, Jared Wilson contributes commentary on this subject in his book, The Imperfect Disciple: Grace for People Who Can’t Get Their Act Together. Addressing the comparison between family life and church life, Wilson writes:

“I think, for instance, of the social platform Instagram. Apparently everybody lives in a golden field, in a renovated farmhouse whitewashed with organic paint and decorated with bowls of ripe fruit positioned just so. The children all wear adorable galoshes, the men flannel, the women paisley sundresses…The whole thing is brilliant and lovely and heartwarming and cute as a button. It’s also fakey fake-fake. It’s a ruse. Ninety-eight percent of family life is simply not ready for Instagram. Is it any wonder so many of us struggle with church community? Because it doesn’t seem Instagram-worthy, like, ever. You put a bunch of people together who aren’t even blood related and expect them to be as utterly devoted to each other as blood relatives ought to be? … Why would we do this? Well, maybe because there isn’t any other legitimate option. The life of Christian discipleship is designed to be lived in community, and if you get beyond those awesome couple of verses about “The Fellowship of the Believers” in Acts 2, you see that even in its earliest forms, the early church was not Instagrammable. But it turned the world upside down” (121-122).

Family life can be hard and messy. Love requires energy and effort, and it’s the same within the life of the church family too. If, however, we love Christ, then we must learn to love what he loves – and he obviously loves the church.

Second, the Christian life is a growth journey. As individuals we are all in the process of learning to follow Jesus, and thus the church is in process too. 

In the opening of First Corinthians, Paul writes, “To the church in Corinth, to those sanctified in Christ Jesus and called to be his holy people, together with all those everywhere who call on the name of our Lord Jesus Christ – their Lord and ours” (1:2).

Without diving too far into the doctrine of sanctification, as different denominations will discuss it with some degree of nuance, Christians understand that it is Christ who makes us holy. This is why at the end of that same chapter Paul says, “Therefore, as it is written: ‘Let the one who boasts boast in the Lord’” (1 Cor. 1:31).

Sanctification is a work of God’s grace in our lives as we become more like him, and the longer we live with him the more we come to look like him. This is why sanctification is often simply defined as Christian growth.

Why does this matter? Because being set apart doesn’t make us perfect. We are saints who will still sin, and hurt others and need to repent and continue to grow. And, since the church is made up of such imperfect people, the church itself will continue to be imperfect. Thus, since we are people who need grace, we must also be people who extend grace.

In my life I have been blessed by the church and, unfortunately, I have been hurt by it. I have seen it serve the world, but I have also been saddened by its response to the world at times. No, the church is not perfect, and if it were, I recognize there’d be no place for me, or you, in it -but here we are. 

We are Christ’s family. I am one of them, and so are you.

So, brother and sister, let’s do the hard work of praying together, considering and discussing the trends that are influencing our local and extended family. But let’s do so in love and humility as we continue to meet together, and while we urge each other on in good works and growth (Heb. 10:24-25).